Independent Women

Before I comment, I want to give credit where credit is due. Most of my ideas spawned from an article that I read by Cliff Young entitled "What Men Really Think About Successful, Independent Women". Any direct quotes from his articles are in quotation marks and italicized.

"Being friends with females is great, but most guy-girl friendships need to be clarified at some point. I once heard somewhere that in every guy-girl non-dating relationship, one person or the other at some point wants the relationship to go further than just a friendship. Think about it, if it’s not you, it’s probably them. "

• While I give Cliff credit for his words, this is a thought that I have expressed many times - I think even in a blog entry. Men and women can't truly be friends - at one point in the friendship one or both people have wanted to pursue a relationship. The good thing is to know that there is a chance the guy is interested if you just want to be his friend and if you like him that maybe he just wants to be friends. This can be a very sticky situation for either person. If you are the one that just wants to be friends then you feel like you have to be careful to never "encourage" the relationship - in some cases, you even worry about being nice because you think they may interpret it wrong. If you are the one with the crush, then you probably read something into every touch, ever comment, every action that the other person makes. You think "does that mean he likes me because he wanted to sit by me?" or most likely it means "we're pals and I let you know that we were just pals by always having an excuse when you invited me somewhere". The problem is knowing when he/she likes you back and it is mutual beyond a friendship. Good luck solving that problem! I still don't have a good radar when he is just giving the friend vibe and I am not good at giving "just the friend" vibe without being too harsh. To help figure out where your friendship/potential relationship lies, I say just go for it. If you ask him out and he says no then nothing is lost and you have your answer. The friendship may be awkward for a few weeks/months but eventually you will move past it and back to the friend plane.
• Good news is that just like you have crushes on someone, by the law of averages someone has a crush on you too!

"Women want to be pursued, they want to be needed in a relationship and they want to be treated like a lady - chivalry is not gone or outdated (you may want to “Google” the term if you’re unsure of what it means; that would be a good start."

• I was so glad to finally read this in print so I know that I am not crazy. In the article, this point fell under Lessons Learned for men. This is something that I have thought about over and over recently. I just want a guy to ask me out, pursue me a little bit - I don't want to ask you out, I want you to call, ask me out, act interested, call me back, etc. I don't mind asking a guy out but I lose interest faster if I do that. Instead, I want to be pursued, romanced, etc. I want to be excited about the ride the relationship will take and I want to enjoy the ride of not knowing what might happen next - whisk me off to the mountains for the weekend, show up with a flower in the car seat, take me out on a date to play putt-putt or go to the driving range (not dinner and a movie), go rollerblading or on a bike built for two on the Silver Comet trail...

Top 10 Cities for Singles

Thanks to Forbes for compiling this list and for helping me to decide to move to Denver!

Top 10 Cities for Singles
1 - Denver-Boulder
2 - Boston
3 - Phoenix
4 - San Francisco-Oakland
5 - New York
6 - Raleigh-Durham
7 - Seattle
8 - Austin, Texas
9 - Washington D.C.-Baltimore
10 - Miami

Does anyone see Atlanta on this list? Apparently, we are #16 out of 40.

To see the full article about this list, please click here (MSN) or here(Forbes.com).

Things You Don't See Everyday...

Today, I was running after work. I was taking a nice jog down Conneticut to 16th towards The Mall. At the beginning of my run. the police were starting to stop all of the traffic on the cross streets. When I got to the corner of 16th and Pennsylvania, all traffic and people were stopped. As I stood there, I saw the parade of cops and cars drive in bringing the new Iraqi prime minister to visit the President. The Iraqi flag was flying from the cars and from a nearby brick building where the cars all pulled up. How cool is that? On my run back from The Mall, I was thinking "what must he think of America?" - what a melting pot of people all busily moving on the street, getting things done, and living mostly in harmony. Wonder if he thought that? See related article about the visit.

The Glamorous Life

I just got back from watching "The Devil Wears Prada" which I hadn't planned on going to see because it didn't seem like my type of movie. Suprisingly enough, it was a fun movie to see and actually had a good moral story towards the end. Which do you choose: A) the glamorous life where everyone wants to be you and you do whatever you can to stay in those shoes or do you B)follow your head, your passion, and maintain your integrity and self. It's funny because we all want to be those people that we see on TV. We want to walk the red carpet, we want the Gucci, Dolce and Gabbana, Jimmy Choos to wear, we want to be famous/to be known, we want to be rich. But do we really want all that? Is that life really all that it is cracked up to be? I remember when I was little, I would picture myself going to work (walking down the street to work from my cute house to be specific)in a high powered suit and high heels. I would head straight towards my corner office and then I would ... I never actually pictured what I would be doing, just what I would be wearing. In reality, high heels aren't comfortable and suits are kind of stuffy - I hate wearing heels or a suit to work. Luckily, I don' have to. I can settle for the semi-fashional black pants, cute shoes, and a fun top. So my outfit doesn't exactly fit the life I dreamed about. But the setting is as close as it has ever been - I am getting to walk to work but instead of from my house to work, it is from my hotel to work. Which also involves a car, plane, and metro to actually get to that hotel so that I can walk. So again, not exactly what I dreamed as the "picture perfect job" would be. So now that the setting doesn't work, I can see that what I wanted isn't really want I wanted at all. So, is that glamorous life, really what we all want? Maybe we should forget the setting and picture on what makes us happy. Do we like what we do at work? Is it our passion? And do we have to follow the cultural "standard" for what we should all be doing and wearing?

Table for One

I sit in a restaurant composing this blog on the back of a receipt. This is the second time in 2 weeks that I've been at a table of one. Last week it was eating sushi at a sushi bar next to strangers and today it is at a romantic Italian restaurant. Of course both places the maître d' asked if I was waiting for someone and I merely said "no, just one tonight". In both resataurants I had very fast service - it must not be hard to cook just one meal - the dinner even arrived as I write...maybe the food arrives fast because the server knows you have no one to talk to and don't need to wait on the conversation to get going. Maybe the food just cooks faster. I do think being a Party of 1 has its advantages - faster seating and faster service. It even gives you some time to think about your day and allow your mind to wander. It is the one part of the day where you don't have to be doing anything and you don't have to converse with anyone, you can just simply be. It's funny because being a Party of 1 in my hometown is frightening but being a Party of 1 on the road is exciting and has potential for adventure because you never know who you might meet. I think I can finally enjoy being a Table for One!

Cheatin' Is Getting Harder

What is your response when a guy says "Sorry I didn't call, I was out of town." Really, were you out of town for the last month with no cell service? In this day and age of info technology you are pretty much connected to the cell phone on one hip and email on the other unless you live in seclusion in a third world country. In this case, one of two things happened - you really were out of town and just got "busy" or maybe (and also more likely) your girlfriend was the cause that you didn't call. In this day and age of technology with tools like Google, mySpace, blogs, etc it is harder and harder to lie and get away with it. A guy says he wants to go out but low and behold his mySpace profile says he is in a relationship, maybe even says he is married. Even employers are getting in on the action and checking out their potential hires by doing research using Google and mySpace. That in itself would be a good discussion. But, "we" only know what "you" post about yourself. I only know you have a girlfriend because your profile says it, your employer only knows that you really went to a small town college instead of UGA like your resume says when he researches the internet.

I could stop there but want to back-up to Mr Out-of-Town. My theory on his comments are not that he ever planned to call or that he ever plans to call in the future. His comments were mearly a "I want to keep you as an option" because we all want options. I don't think this is strictly guy thing. I want options too. I have prefernces and if Guy A is interested and Guy B is interested, I want to go out with both and then figure out who I like. To answer my own question, what do you say when a guy apologizes for not calling ... if you are quick on your feet like me and know that he has a girlfriend your hightly intellectual response is "Whatever."

"Find Your Spot" Website

A friend recently told me about this website - findyourspot.com. The website asks you a series of questions (ie about the weather, sporting events, activities you like to do, etc) and then uses your responses to help determine a list of cities that you might like to live in.

I am not sure if I agree with my list because neither Atlanta nor DC are on the list and I love those 2 cities. Here's my list:

Charleston, South Carolina Cosmopolitan Southern CityFort Sumter, the scene of the first shots of the Civil War, overlooks this city's harbor...
Population: 562,700 Average Home Price: $270,000 Precipitation: 52" Snow: 0"

Orlando, Florida Florida’s Entertainment CapitalIn this entertainment mecca, you can wrestle alligators at Gatorland or have lunch with Mickey Mouse…
Population: 1,645,000 Average Home Price: $265,000 Precipitation: 50" Snow: 0"

Houston, Texas City of ExcitementTexas won its independence from Mexico at a battle fought here in 1836; the city became the capital of the Republic of Texas...
Population: 4,420,000 Average Home Price: $180,000 Precipitation: 48" Snow: 0"

Tampa, Florida Paradise on the BayThis Florida town's annual Gasparilla Pirate Fest includes a parade, an arts festival, and a "pirate invasion"…
Population: 2,500,000 Average Home Price: $257,000 Precipitation: 49" Snow: 0"

Austin, Texas City of the Violet CrownThis "Hill Country" capital boasts 12,000 acres of greenbelt and undeveloped land used for recreation…
Population: 656,600 Average Home Price: $154,000 Precipitation: 31" Snow: 1"
Norfolk, Virginia Heart of the Hampton RoadsThis spot was the only American city completely destroyed and rebuilt in the Revolutionary War; a British cannonball in St. Paul's Church wall is a reminder…
Population: 1,606,000 Average Home Price: $182,000 Precipitation: 45" Snow: 7"

Dallas, Texas The Star of the Lone Star StateAlthough one of the country's largest cities, this spot is the least densely populated metropolitan area in the world…
Population: 3,743,000 Average Home Price: $207,000 Precipitation: 33" Snow: 3"

Fort Worth, Texas Where the West BeginsThe first "washateria" (laundromat) opened in this town on April 18, 1934 with four machines…
Population: 534,700 Average Home Price: $135,000 Precipitation: 32" Snow: 3"

Chesapeake-Virginia Beach, Virginia The Southern Tidewater RegionThis Virginia beach town's annual Neptune Festival features sports competitions, an arts and crafts show, and a Grand Ball…
Population: 624,000 Average Home Price: $252,000 Precipitation: 45" Snow: 1"
Jacksonville, Florida Florida’s First CoastHere in Florida’s “youngest city” the median age is just 32…
Population: 778,000 Average Home Price: $242,000 Precipitation: 54" Snow: 0"

West Palm Beach, Florida The Gold CoastThis famous Florida spot hosts "Sunfest," the state's largest music and art festival on the waterfront…
Population: 1,216,000 Average Home Price: $430,000 Precipitation: 60" Snow: 0"

Charlotte, North Carolina The Queen CityHome to First Union and Bank of America, this spot is renowned as a financial center…
Population: 1,335,000 Average Home Price: $232,000 Precipitation: 43" Snow: 6"

San Antonio, Texas Three Centuries of CultureCobblestone walkways wind past restaurants and shops along this city's famous Paseo del Rio, or RiverWalk…
Population: 1,144,650 Average Home Price: $160,000 Precipitation: 30" Snow: 1"

Brownsville, Texas On the Border, By the SeaThis town at the southern tip of Texas began as Fort Brown, built to support the U.S. claim to the Rio Grande as a southern border…
Population: 139,700 Average Home Price: $100,000 Precipitation: 25" Snow: 0"

Augusta, Georgia Georgia’s Garden CityThe Masters golf tournament is held in this Georgia town each year…
Population: 484,000 Average Home Price: $121,000 Precipitation: 42" Snow: 0"
Memphis, Tennessee Home of the Delta BluesThis city's famous Beale Street gave birth to Blues, Rock 'n' Roll, and legends such as BB King and Elvis Presley…
Population: 650,000 Average Home Price: $150,000 Precipitation: 49" Snow: 3"

Oklahoma City, Oklahoma Big City on the PlainsLocated in the heart of America, visitors to this town can use water taxis to visit restaurants and shops in the famous Bricktown district…
Population: 523,000 Average Home Price: $141,000 Precipitation: 32" Snow: 9"

Louisville, Kentucky Home of the Kentucky DerbyThis beautiful river city was home to Colonel Harland Sanders, founder of Kentucky Fried Chicken…
Population: 248,000 Average Home Price: $186,000 Precipitation: 43" Snow: 17"

McAllen, Texas City of PalmsThis lush spot in Rio Grande country is a birdwatcher's paradise, home each April to the Texas Tropics Nature Festival...
Population: 106,400 Average Home Price: $120,000 Precipitation: 26" Snow: 0"

Nashville, Tennessee Music City, U.S.A.Though best known for its music, this spot also boasts the Hermitage, home to Andrew Jackson, Americas first president from the wild "West"…
Population: 545,500 Average Home Price: $169,000 Precipitation: 46" Snow: 11"

Galveston, Texas An Island OasisIt snows once a year in this city on the Gulf of Mexico - when the snowmaking machine is turned on during the Dickens Christmas festival…
Population: 57,000 Average Home Price: $175,000 Precipitation: 42" Snow: 0"

Miami, Florida The Gold CoastThis exciting Florida melting pot city draws on West Indian, Cuban, African, European and Native American heritages…
Population: 376,800 Average Home Price: $432,000 Precipitation: 60" Snow: 0"

Richmond, Virginia Rising Star of the SouthPatrick Henry made his famous "give me liberty or give me death" speech at Saint John's Episcopal Church in this city in 1775…
Population: 198,000 Average Home Price: $240,000 Precipitation: 43" Snow: 14"

Clearwater, Florida City of Gold Medal BeachesOnce you're done playing in the sun and sand, you can ride the world's largest speedboat in this unique city...
Population: 109,000 Average Home Price: $187,000 Precipitation: 51" Snow: 0"